Stress is…. Complicated
As someone who is well acquainted with stress, I haven’t understood it very well. However, this semester has taught me that this is normal. My professor started our Stress, Coping, and Resilience class, by explaining how hard stress is to study.
Here’s some reasons:
Stress is felt internally, so we cannot take universal outward facing measurements of it. We have to rely on test subjects to report it. If I ask you how stressed you are during a stressful moment, I’ll get a high rating, but if I ask you how stressed you’ve been over the last month… well, that’s going to mess with our data because it’s hard to remember. For instance, can you tell me the exact number of times you were stressed even within the last week? How about the intensity of each of those stressful times? Turns out, we’re not very good at reporting our stress.
Another reason studying stress is complicated is because the causes of stress vary by person. Meaning, what stresses me out, may be different than what stresses you out. Some researchers have looked at stress triggers to measure strain across the board, but the results of how stressed someone rates themselves can still vary widely. This is because of individually unique factors such as emotional resilience and healthy social support influence how stressed someone can become.
Although stress is tough to measure, there is enough research to show that people under stress perform poorer. In fact, according to stress generation theory, when we are under stress (or if we are vulnerable to stress), we are more likely to behave in ways that then increase our stress. For example, if I am stressed about an upcoming project deadline, I may begin cutting out things from my schedule to make space to get more done on the project. What am I cutting out? Things such as a full night’s sleep, healthy meal prep, and exercise time. However, if I cut those things out, I am more likely to increase my stress levels and my capacity to deal with additional stress.
Now, having to push and rearrange healthy habits to hit a deadline every now and then is ok. It is when we repeatedly put our body into this survival mode that stress begins to have detrimental effects. Not only does the research support this, but I have lived it.
I found my first gray hair at 19 years old. Some of that has to do with genetics, but a lot of it has to do with how good I am at stressing myself out. Now, an undisclosed amount of time later, my hair is fully silver. I’ve lost a gallbladder, I’m prone to migraines, and my weight fluctuates in direct correlation with my stress levels. These are things the doctors have told me are directly related to my stress. I’m sure there’s other physical manifestations as well, they’re just harder to track. A large part of my physical challenges are due to the coping behaviors I chose to use during survival mode. However, some of it is also due to my body releasing chemicals constantly that are meant to only be used to protect myself in dire situations. There are theories that if you keep your body in constant flight/fight/freeze mode, that the chemicals released in those instances that help you stay alive in short bursts can begin to hurt you from the inside out. Although they are helpful in jolting your system to run, they are harmful in large, sustained quantities.
So, what do we do about it? Well, there’s actually quite a bit that you can do and I have other articles focused on coping and resilience. However, I want to be clear that if you are feeling extreme stress, don’t just bury it. If you bury it too often too many times, you’ll discover burnout and that comes with a terrible interest rate. Also, being stuck in stress is not something to be proud of. It does not represent your ability to give, care, and/or be productive. I got stuck in that belief cycle too often. I care a lot about many things. It’s both a strength and weakness of mine. Finding meaning and purpose in almost any task can bring great amounts of satisfaction. However, when that meaning and purpose begins to overrule your own health, that’s when the stress creeps in. Ironically, finding meaning and purpose behind your stress can be a powerful coping mechanism in its own right.
See how complicated all of this can be?
I like ego-depletion theory for understanding stress (it is similar to theories for emotional regulation). It compares our capabilities to deal with stress to how we work out a muscle. Meaning, as you exercise, you’ll deplete your strength and eventually, after enough reps, you’ll reach failure and need to rest. However, in doing the reps, you’re also building your strength down the road. Avoiding stress is not the answer to deal with stress because exposure to stress is one way to build resilience to it. However, constant exposure to stress can lead to injury. What you need are moments of pushing and moments of resting. Learning how to rest between stressors is just as important as learning to build up your resilience to them.
If you or someone you know is dealing with extreme stress or burnout, please reach out to a licensed professional. My therapist literally saved me. She helped me claw my way out of burnout in this last year and the lessons I’ve learned have been some of my greatest treasures. Till then, I hope you choose to do something to recharge today.
If you’re interested in reading more about some of the current research into stress, the American Psychological Association (APA) releases a study each year. The link to the press release from their 2023 study is here: Stress in America 2023: A nation recovering from collective trauma (apa.org)